devonsmommy
Just Hatched
Devon
Joined: December 2005
Posts: 2
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Post by devonsmommy on Dec 12, 2005 13:51:09 GMT -7
My husband I got, Devon, a month ago he is almost 2 years old. The family that he was with last told us that he did not like men at all. They were right. He is a sweetheart to me, but as far as my husband, he does not like him when I am in the room. He will bite my husband and will not let him pet him. When he is holding Devon and I am in the same room he will growl until he is by me.
My husband will never admit it, but I know that it hurts his feelings. What can I do to make Devon love both of us? Any suggestions?
Devon’s Mommy
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Post by jozi on Dec 12, 2005 14:37:30 GMT -7
I made my fiance the primary treat giver. On his way out to the balcony every morning for a smoke he gives BoBo a nut...BoBo starts to ask for it now as soon as our alarm goes off...he won't even take it from me now...it has to be from Sean. Sean is also in charge of sharing his meals with BoBo (hehe) Actually, the poor guy now has to share EVERYTHING on his plate with either BoBo or myself and no matter where in our place Sean is eating...BoBo is sure to find him and ask to be picked up! BoBo will never accept Sean like he accepts me but they are working out the details of their own kind of relationship. Point in case - this weekend I walked into the house after being gone for about an hour to find BoBo standing on Sean's arm eating out of his soup bowl. Food...the love is in the food.
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Post by Jane on Dec 12, 2005 16:03:23 GMT -7
This is very common with Greys, it is one of the things which came up many times on the old forum and on this one. I don't think you can make a Grey love people equally; they often choose a favourite person and, as you have found, sometimes favour one sex over the other. Mitzi much prefers females and is bonded to me although Monty shows no preference despite having an identical upbringing. Sharing cleaning and feeding between you may help but you might also have to accept that Devon will have a different relationship with each of you.
Jane
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devonsmommy
Just Hatched
Devon
Joined: December 2005
Posts: 2
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Post by devonsmommy on Dec 13, 2005 9:07:25 GMT -7
Thank you both very much...I guess we will have to accept the fact that Devon will be a momma's boy and have my husband, Johnny, give him lots of treats.
That's too funny about Bobo asking for his treat...they are like little people.
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linzie
Weaned Todd
Joined: August 2005
Posts: 36
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Post by linzie on Dec 16, 2005 8:31:44 GMT -7
We had the same problem with our grey, there is no way that he will ever be the same with my partner as he is with me, but hes now much better than he used to be in that when hes told he will "go to daddy" and will let my partner pick him up and will accept treats and even the occasional tickle from him, so everyone's happy. As Jozi said, we found the "secret" was in the food - bribary, call it what you will, but its worked for us
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Post by jilll on Dec 18, 2005 11:51:32 GMT -7
I'm the favorite with our grey. Fortunately, my husband loves birds, too and he doesn't hesitate to pick up Oliver, play, feed, etc. My husband's pretty "assertive" with him and kinda lets him know "who's the boss", if you know what I mean. So... Oliver likes him, too but just much sweeter with me.
I'd say for him to just keep picking him up, letting him know that they like your bird, too. Keep interacting, not backing off. And food always helps!
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Post by traci on Dec 19, 2005 3:25:36 GMT -7
Boo is 110% a momma's boy.... daddy is the one who he could rough house with and now thats all he knows him for is RH playing and wont or should say not very often let him touch him, he will if im holding him, then daddy can give him a scratch.. other wise Forget it ....
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Post by lidiam on Dec 20, 2005 6:06:14 GMT -7
Joshua has been in a terrible mood lately, really awful, and he has been quite nippy and bitey. A close friend of mine moved into the flat next door to mine a few months back, and Joshua has got into the habit of seeing her almost every day. Lately, he has been hitching a ride on her shoulder to have a tour of her flat every day as soon as she comes home from work. For it to be effective (for him) he has to have a look into practically every nook and cranny in her flat. If he doesn't get to do this tour with her he acts up and looks totally bereft, bats his wings and looks like he wants to leave me and move in with her! However, my pal comes into my flat for G&Ts at least four times a week, and we are ALWAYS nattering to and fro to one another. But when she IS in my flat he is not terribly anxious to be with her, though he likes her and often sits on her lap. I know it must be boring for him to always see the same landscape (except when he's at the vet's), but I think I may have helped him to develop a really bad habit that is becoming burdensome for my pal. Advice? Thoughts? Lidia
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Post by jozi on Dec 20, 2005 10:27:25 GMT -7
Sounds like Joshua could use a day trip out! I started taking BoBo out for a mini trip once every couple of weeks (more in the summer). He LOVES going in his travel cage and LOVES watching the world go by!
How does Joshua respond to the command "no"? When he starts to display signs of wanting to go over to your friends place can you tell him no and distract him with a favorite treat while she gets ready to leave?
I may be underestimating the intelligence of a 16 year old parrot though...
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Post by lidiam on Dec 20, 2005 13:09:14 GMT -7
Jozi,
Actually, as if to make a liar of me, he's perfectly at ease this evening! I suppose it could be a phase he's going through.
I like your suggestion about day-trips, but I'm an inner-city gal with a bicycle and no car, I am not sure where I could safely take him. He does need a change of scene though, I think you're right.
Lidia
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Post by jozi on Dec 20, 2005 14:52:20 GMT -7
Hey Lidia Im a downtown girl myself with not even a bike to speak of Due to such circumstances it's always an adventure for both of us when I take BoBo on an excursion with me! BoBo has 2 travel cages that I use depending on the travel and destination. One is just a collapsible overnight cage (a bit too bulky for walking) and the other is his backpack www.chewzybeaks.com/adventure_packs.htm which at first glance looked way too small for BoBo (he's 579 grams!) but he finds it comfortable and I think he feels more secure in it because it is small. So....BoBo and I take the bus together! I've never had anyone mind (one driver asked me to move to the back though because BoBo kept immitating the brake squeal REALLY LOUD everytime he stopped and it was hurting his ears! hehe) I keep his carrier covered until we get settled and then he insists that I take it off so he can see He finds the bus load of people highly entertaining and entertains them in exchange. Let's just say that any pride or shyness that I may have had prior to getting Bobo is GONE! Yup, we can ride that bus (or skytrain) for ever!! The SeaBus too. (little harbour commuter ferry)...actually, he loves any kind of boat. On the big Vancouver Island ferries it takes all of 10 minutes for every child under 12 to find their way to us for a little BoBo entertainment. He adores children and gets a kick out of making them laugh It's been great for socializing him. Oh, by the way, on cooler days I wrap the outside of his travel cage in fleece and line the bottom with a hotwater bottle so he stays warm during the couple blocks to the bus stop. Seems to work okay... I bring him to the park sometimes to watch the dogs (he likes dogs). He also likes to whistle to them and tell them to "come here!" Once in a while I bring BoBo to work with me for a change of pace too. Truthfully, he ends ups more of a pain in the butt than anything. On days when I don't want to go outside...or it's too cold out...I take BoBo with me to "check the mail". This never actually entails checking the mail but it means that we are going to take a wander of my condo building. Emergency exits, the garage, the elevator (especially fun if we meet up with people) the lobby, hallway #1, hallway #2, hallway #3, laundry room...you get the idea. He gets pretty excited about our "mail checking" time. Right now we are working on accepting his harness and leash...it will open so many new experiences for him.
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Post by traci on Dec 20, 2005 17:41:25 GMT -7
hmmmm... now im thinking about one of them backpak type carriers.... i love to take Boo out with me in the spring and summer down the bike path when i walk the dogs, he likes to ride on my shoulder for this trip so that he can see and hear EVERYTHING, he does really well with it too... ( no trying to jump off ect... )
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Post by lidiam on Dec 21, 2005 3:50:15 GMT -7
;)Hi Jozi,
I think your ideas are really good and I will give some thought about how to execute them here.
Where you are must be a much nicer place than Dublin, where people are aggressive and sometimes dangerous. I am not absolutely certain it is safe enough in Dublin to do what you do in Canada. The streets are over-crowded and there are a lot of drug-crazed people roming the place, and quite a lot of street crime and violence, even in the posher parts of the city. I would fear for Joshua's safety out and about from some idiot who might think it was amusing to scare him or attempt to hurt him (or me). I would even worry that I could be mugged to get Joshua from me.
But BoBo's life sounds great. If I could fit into a carrier, would you mind taking me out on all those trips?
My laptop became ill last night and while I could log in and see your comments, I couldn't type a response because the keyboard is typing gibberish, otherwise I'd have answered sooner.
Lidia
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Post by jozi on Dec 22, 2005 15:31:40 GMT -7
Hi Lidia I'll tell you what...you come out to Vancouver, Canada and I will take you anywhere you want to go! (you might have to walk but once you get used to the harness and leash, Im sure you will be just fine ;D) As for my area being safe...uh, nope. Vancouver, Surrey, Burnaby are the top 3 most violent, crime ridden cities in all of Canada...and they are all part of the same district...sheesh! To boot - I live in the "projects"...actually, I have taken him out a couple times to socialize with some of the homeless in my neighborhood...BoBo's body language is a great indicator as to who is safe and who is not and those that I have spent time with have enjoyed the opportunity for a change of scenery. I'll admit that BoBo and I get away with a lot due to him being a curiosity factor and I being a small young female that garnish's the protection of most male strangers. The area I live in is not nearly as scary as I thought it was when I first moved in... Let me tell you though...if somebody ever tried to take BoBo from me...well, let's just say that it wouldn't be very pretty...or ladylike If you invest in one of the backpacks you can wear it on your front where Joshua can see you, you can see him and you have a lot more control too.
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Post by lidiam on Dec 23, 2005 13:43:38 GMT -7
I will take it under advisement, counsellor! Lidia
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